Ahem.
With all of my recent off-line notoriety, I have a small request to make. A really small one, one that will even fit into the sweetest of cavities. I would like an iPhongasmatron. One that, when correctly placed, would really couple with my lifestyle for the complete organasmic experience.
Regardless of outcome… I’m not really sure WHY but this guy right here has been stuck with this desire for the last few years. The desire to document his life, including the 'It's Not A...' kind of things that are better left unsaid. I’m not sure.
Maybe I'm into it for the ringtones when on 'silent mode' (oh! Call me again, please!). Maybe the possibilities of the strategically placed camera are... enticing.
But it just looks and feels right. That is… until the negative consequences come. Perhaps there is a way to balance out the equation. Make it a net positive. I think it’s already happening. Via love, forgiveness and gratitude. Amazing. A better creation is possible!
So I ask the community: I want 4 deluxe sensi-touch iPhongasmatrons, with unlimited backdoor roaming, remote rooter calling, SMS, EMS, it'sAmess, unlimited minutes, self-lubricating, extended battery packs, rump ranger, auto-colonic, night vision and beer goggles (to help me with my new friends). In exchange, I'll continue to share things you can't even imagine for the iRide Of You Life!
Murst!
ReplyDeleteI thought Casey would have had a GuyPhone (the PDA/cell for the sophisticated young urban businessman) since they're targeted as Single Trendy Upwardly-mobile Personal Information Device(s).
Don't cause a problem where a fart isn't a fart Casey. Can we get some hooters soon? Oh wait, Casey doesn't really like the Hooters.
ReplyDeleteYou missed one feature he needs in his new phone. Gaydar. That feature will allow him to find potential clients and let him become lucky pierre.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=lucky+pierre
No Hooters for me. Casey has talked me into trying Dicks.
ReplyDeleteDoes it have to be purple?
ReplyDeleteWow! Can I get one, too?
ReplyDeleteSweet new banner Casey!!!
ReplyDeleteI was going to post over at your new blog that you hijacked from your brother, but it looks like you banned me. I guess I am better off just trolling over here instead. Thanks!
You are a sick perv - a gay pig eating squirrels.
ReplyDelete